On Demand

We live in a world that doesn’t have to wait for anything. We can DVR tv shows or watch an episode on Netflix. We have apps that allow us to order fast food from our smart phones so that we can avoid waiting in long lines. These resources have caused us to be so impatient. We won’t wait for anything because we don’t have to. Don’t get me wrong, I have used all these helpful resources. I’m all for technology that helps us utilize our time. But, are these things actually doing more harm than good? 
Currently, I feel like I am waiting in a line that never moves. I’m waiting on my husband. I don’t even like typing those words. I am exposing my most vulnerable places to the world right now. So, be gentle. Don’t judge me. I feel like I’ve been waiting here for a lifetime. Sometimes, I get out of the line. I say to myself, just forget it. Chris, you don’t want a husband anymore. I tell myself, I’ve waited entirely too long and he isn’t worth the wait. You won’t even like him after the honeymoon over? I have days where I believe those lies to be the solid truth. But, I also have days where the Lord gently whispers the real truth to me. Scripture says in Matthew 7:7, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” This scripture has been a reoccurring verse the Lord has used to speak to me about my future husband. People have randomly prayed it over me over the last 3 years without even knowing what this verse means to me. Today the Lord reminded me of His promise during worship at church. This verse was spoken and I was immediately brought to tears. I cried because my heart hurts. I cried because it was exactly what I needed to hear today. The Lord knew I needed a word of encouragement. He knows I am tired of waiting. He knows I want to give up. My emotions are all over the place lately. I feel like I’m riding the bipolar express. I wish I could just turn off my desire for a husband. Believe me, I’ve tried. I’ve even lied to myself a time or two. But, It didn’t work. The desire always comes back. Each time with a deeper longing for a spouse than before. I’ve had to get honest with myself & the Lord about this desire. A desire that He put inside of me. My prayers have gone from nice little compliant prayers to real, raw emotional pleas for God to provide the man He has for me. I wish I had an app or something I could use to speed up this process. I truly hate waiting on anything especially things I really want. But, I believe the Lord has told me He has a husband for me. I believe He will provide me with a husband in His timing. Therefore, I will wait. 
What are you waiting on from the Lord? Trust Him with your desires. He is faithful. I know the waiting process is hard, but the Lord is faithful to bring about His promises to His children. 
CAT

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